Distress at 18,000 feet

[sigurdur]

An air traffic control tower suddenly lost communications with a small twin engine aircraft.
A moment later the tower landline rang and was answered by one of the employees.

The passenger riding with the pilot who lost communications was on a cellular phone and yelled
"Mayday, mayday!! The pilot had an instant and fatal heart attack. I grabbed his cell phone
Out of his pocket and he had told me before we took off he had the tower on his speed dial
Memory. I am flying upside down at 18,000 feet and travelling at 180 mph. Mayday, mayday!!"

The employee in the tower had put him on speaker phone immediately.
"Calm down, we acknowledge you and we will guide you down after a few questions.
The first thing is not to panic, remain calm!!".

He began his series of questions.

Tower: "How do you know you are travelling at 18,000 feet??"

Aircraft: "I can see that it reads 18,000 feet on the dials in front of me".

Tower: "Okay, that is good, remain calm. How do you know you are travelling at 180 mph??"

Aircraft: "I can see that it reads 180 mph on the dials in front of me".

Tower: Okay, that is good. How do you know you're flying upside down??"

Aircraft: "Because the sh!t in my pants is sliding out of my collar."


thingy

[scpg02]

A doctor goes out and buys the best car on the market, a brand new Ferrari
GTO
It is also the most expensive car in the world, and it costs him $500,000.
He takes it out for a spin and stops at a red light.


An old man on a Moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to him.

The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks,
"What kind of car ya got there, sonny?"

The doctor replies, "A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a million dollars!"

"That's a lot of money," says the old man. "Why does it cost so much?"

"Because this car can do up to 250 miles an hour!" states the doctor
proudly.

The Moped driver asks, "Mind if I take a look inside?"

"No problem," replies the doctor.

So the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around.
Then, sitting back on his Moped, the old man says,
"That's a pretty nice car, all right... but I'll stick with my Moped!"

Just then the light changes, so the doctor decides to show the old man
just what his car can do.
He floors it, and within 30 seconds, the speedometer reads 150 mph. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror.
It seems to be getting closer!
He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly.

WHHHOOOOOOSSSSSHHH!

Something whips by him going much faster.
"What on earth could be going faster than my Ferrari" the doctor asks himself. He floors the accelerator and takes the Ferrari up to 175 mph.
Then, up ahead of him, he sees that it's the old man on the Moped!
Amazed that the Moped could pass his Ferrari, he gives it more gas and passes the moped at 210 mph.

WHOOOOOOOSHHHHH!

He's feeling pretty good until he looks in his mirror and sees the old man
gaining on him AGAIN!

Astounded by the speed of his old guy, he floors the gas pedal and takes
the Ferrari all the way up to 250 mph.
Not ten seconds later, he sees the Moped bearing down on him again!
The Ferrari is flat out, and there's nothing he can do!

Suddenly, the Moped plows into the back of his Ferrari, demolishing the
rear end.
The doctor stops and jumps out and unbelievably the old man is
still alive.
He runs up to the mangled old man and says, "Oh My Gosh!
Is there anything I can do for you?"

The old man whispers, "Unhook my suspenders from your side view mirror."